The relentless circle homo sapiens go through.

-R

There could have been no two hearts so open, no tastes so similar, no feelings so in unison, no countenances so beloved. Now they were as strangers; nay, worse than strangers, for they could never become acquainted. It was perpetual estrangement.

-R

-R

It's as if blogging was once "in trend" and now, no longer.

I mean, no hate towards micro-blogging and reblogging, I myself fell victim into the hands of these evil, obsessive machines that take hours and hours of your day and often times distract you from (paying) jobs. But, seriously, I miss blogging, I miss reading everyone else's blogs. I miss people having an opinion on something rather than suppressing our thoughts under 140 words and pictures taken by someone else, that's been recirculating for the dozenth time.

Well, I am a hypocrite.

I blog once a month. But I'm consistently on twitter and I use tumblr to post pictures. I have nothing to write about, I have nothing to voice and nothing I've done, eaten, worn, seen is blog-worthy.

SO I PROPOSE we bring blogs back in fashion.

-R

You know why I haven't been updating much of late?

It's because I didn't wanna bore whoever reading my sordid blog, with a sordid story about what I did, or ate, or thought of, or felt.

You know what?

Screw that.

It's my blog. It's my name. I don't care anymore. Everyone else can form their own opinion, prior or post meeting me. The only opinion that matters is my mother's.

Form your opinions, make your assumptions, disregard all my previous attempts to display whatever semblance of respect that you should offer me. And, while you're at it, spread your opinions to other people.

I strive to be the person I am today, and if that doesn't sit well with you, then... well, take it up some place else. I may not be in the best of places for a 19 year old, but I'm getting there. I'm going through an internship at one of the most notable firms in Malaysia and juggling a part time job, I'm so sorry if I'm not the loveliest human being around. I can't blame anyone else if they're not a Stepford wife on speed, you have so much things to be present for, so many things to attempt, so many things on your mind.

So, yeah. I'm done putting on a show. Like I'm a put together human being. I was failing miserably before, but now I'm not even gonna try.

Hokay.

-R

It's 4.33am and I've just spent most of today, and all of yesterday in front of a desk, figuring out the correct angular calculations using the Bowditch's method. I'm tired. My mind is blocked, but yet here I am.

Hidup ini palat, tapi esok masih ada.

-R

Here's the thing about the phrase "never again".

When I was in New Delhi, my brother and I were introduced to an amazing restaurant called "Karim's" in the center of Old Delhi, the most chaotic part of the city. As soon as our auto-rickshaw arrived within a 2km radius of Old Delhi, our breathing slows down as the air gets thicker, more condense. The people are pushy, literally. A chaotic frenzy rushes into your system, making you feel 100 times more alert of your surroundings than you normally are. And what more with everyone reminding you to have your valuables really close. With the thousands of tangles of powerlines a few feet above your head, all you can wonder is "why the hell isn't something on fire?"

The food at Karim's? Delicious. The smell of the exact kind of masala still to this day remains in my head. The remnants of butter chicken in our plates, the exact kind of roti we had, the clay pots used to cook the food. Everything still in my memory, still well-intact.

But Amirul and I made a deal to "never again" step foot into Old Delhi. Never again. Everything was too overwhelming for us newbies. I made a point to write in my bible of a guidebook that we should "NEVER AGAIN" (underlined, highlighted) go into Old Delhi.

After several days, numerous train rides, enough frowners as tour guides, the Taj Mahal!, Incredible Jaipur, so many auto-rickshaws, enough expensive entrance fees, two Jantar Mantars, amazing views, five dozen and a half memories, a memory card full of breathtaking pictures, we were back in Delhi.

And what did we do first? We headed back to Karim's.

Why? Because "never again" should never hold someone back.

(And somehow, I feel that you should never be a never again case.)

-R